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Windows 10 Mobile is receiving its death-day security updates

Windows 10 Mobile is receiving its death-day security updates

There’s something familiar DEAR DIARY, As I watch the events back home unfold, a tear forms in my bossed-eyes. I left the UK to escape persecution – from politicians, from those who didn’t understand, from mum for constantly complaining about the Wotsit crumbs stuck to the bedsheets.  This morning, a young boy, a messenger from

Windows 10 Mobile is receiving its death-day security updates

There’s something familiar

DEAR DIARY,

As I watch the events back home unfold, a tear forms in my bossed-eyes.

I left the UK to escape persecution – from politicians, from those who didn’t understand, from mum for constantly complaining about the Wotsit crumbs stuck to the bedsheets. 

This morning, a young boy, a messenger from the next village came with a note for me.

Diary. The dream is over. My beloved Windows Mobile 10 is dead. It’s now Tuesday in the West, and the last Patch Tuesday for the greatest phone operating system in history is about to hit my 37 Windows Mobile handsets. I’ll have to sideload it on to the other 15 that are already EoL.

Then, after that – what is there? Just emptiness. Pointlessness. And Tiled launches for Android.

You’d have thought they’d have made some sort of fanfare over the demise of the best operating system in the world, but no – Diary, this is its final legacy:

“Windows 10 Mobile, version 1709 (released October 2017) is the last release of Windows 10 Mobile and Microsoft will end support on December 10, 2019. The end of support date applies to all Windows 10 Mobile products, including Windows 10 Mobile and Windows 10 Mobile Enterprise.”

Hardly does it justice does it?

I know the Surface Neo and Surface Duo are going to give some sort of hope for the future. But this truly is the end of an era, and frankly, Diary, I don’t know what’s next for me.

At least nobody knows I’m here. I’ve recreated mum’s basement to the letter, and I get a delivery of Wotsits imported every month. I never need to leave again.

I never thought I was the sort of person who would fake their own death – but when Windows Mobile went… what was the point?

I just hope none of the websites I use to keep in touch with the outside world ever close down, or I really will kill myself.

Love,

Calvin J. Mipatis III

(aka Kevin, the last Windows Mobile User in the world) μ

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